Leaders live their values. Every day. All the time.

If you have to agonize over determining your values then maybe they aren’t really your values at all.  ~Kathryn Scanland

If values are the guiding principles for how people behave, interact, and function in your organization, then it should describe how they are currently acting, not how you wish they would act.  One of the best descriptions I’ve come across to determine personal values is to look at your calendar and your checkbook.  How you spend your time and your money is a real indicator of what you value.

I've found leaders who struggle to identify their organization’s values are struggling because what they are really listing are principles they wish were their values.  Unfortunately, the reality is, if you aren’t currently doing it, then it’s not something you value.  It’s something you want to value.  For example, on a personal level, I might say that I value generosity, but a quick glance at my checkbook might tell a very different story.  Maybe generosity is something I admire, but until I actually do it, it’s not something I really value.

Here’s another example from a young CEO featured in Fast Company.

Everyone knows culture is critical to a company's success. Think Google. What is less obvious is that leadership has to consciously create that very culture.

When we first started Okta, we tried to "manage" culture. We wrote down our company values, we often reiterated them in meetings and thought long and hard about how we could build a company culture that reflected them. 

And while all of that is well and good, over the past three years, I've found that what really matters in creating company culture is how I conduct myself. Every day. All the time. It comes down to which actions and attitudes that I validate and reward, and which behavior I discourage, as well as the kind of people I choose to hire.

If I came to visit your organization, what would I experience in the first ten minutes of my visit and what would that tell me about your real values?  One specific organization comes to mind whenever I pose this question.  They’re a publisher and when I walk through the main entrance I hear the sound of a crowd of people cheering and applauding.  Do I have to even wonder if one of their values is to have a friendly and fun environment?  No, I don’t, because I experienced it first-hand.  It’s who they are, not who they want to be.

Culture and leadership duo Argyris and Schon as well as Edgar Schein make the distinction by calling espoused values those values that people say are their values but may be out of line with what they actually do.   Without delving into too much academic mumbo-jumbo, Schein says that leadership is the source of the beliefs and values that get a group moving in a direction to solve a problem.  These values are built not on what is said to be valued, but on what is valued, in action.  And the values that a group assumes by action are very difficult to change, regardless of what we say we’d like our values to be.  As the young CEO at Okta said, “It’s how I conduct myself. Every day. All the time.”